Tag Archives: crafts

VIDEO: Spring Egg Explosion, and What Should We Call the Lifestyle Channel?

Remember that vanity lifestyle and crafts channel that Rebecca and I are working on? Well, we need a name! Options so far:

  • Pro-Create
  • Pretty Pretty Parenting

Help! We need something that captures messy, normal, non-social-media-ready life but isn’t trying too hard (because we have to pretend like we’re humble). Ideas?

While you brainstorm, here’s a belated Easter/spring craft to do with your kids!

I sent Rebecca this video of two wealthy L.A. moms laughing at themselves making blow job jokes in a million dollar kitchen while blowing eggs. I actually used this video with Boy Woww to make a blown-out egg that we now can’t find.

It’s a good tutorial when you stop yourself from getting distracted by the L.A.-ness and the size of the wedding rings. But who has time to clean their kitchen–especially when they need to contemplate how they would look with a long blonde weave and bangs and a 50-carat ring?

IMG_6549

 

Belated Easter Craft for Kids Everyone Will Love!

So your holiday timing is slightly off… who cares? Pumpkins are cheapest November 1.

 

Make sure to send us a photo of your finished project, or a photo of yourself not doing this craft! Or just a photo of your latest batch of hard-boiled eggs in the Instant Pot. Everyone keeps saying they’re amazing.

 

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The Real Truth About Kid Birthday Parties

Sun Valley Mag Kid's Birthday Party Ideas

Pinterest is propagating this evil lie that kids love elaborate birthday parties involving a minimum of 27 adorable crafts, all of which can be made with things that you already have in your cabinets, plus $400 at Joann Fabrics or that hell that is Michael’s.

This is not true.

Kids, especially little kids, don’t care. The best one year old birthday party we ever went to was at a bar.

But kid birthday parties seem to be getting more and more ornate. Birthday party is the new bridal shower. Coordinated colors, photo cookies, carved cakes, picture booths, mounds of take-home loot….

Need proof? Just look at these simple ways to decorate a kid birthday party, including making photo cake toppers, sewing party decorations together, and adding personalized accents to gift bags!

Gift Bag Decor Pear Tree Greetings

Or you can make a five-layer rainbow cake (photo at top).

Looks cute, doesn’t it? But you’re going to need to buy extra cake pans and way more food coloring than is currently on the shelf at your grocery store. Then six hours later you’ll have a beautiful rainbow cake that kids will see for 30 seconds as they throw pieces at their mouths.

Stop the madness!

What’s that you say? Some people love crafts? Some people don’t swear and get resentful while sewing together coordinated banners cut out with craft scissors?

More power to them! And I love attending their children’s birthday parties. But it’s not a good idea for me to teach my children so many four-letter-words while I craft it up over here at chaos central.

If you are on the fence about hosting a kid party worthy of the Pinterest hall of fame, keep these things in mind:

  1. The kids just want, in this order, 1) cake, 2) cake, 3) cake, 4) maybe singing, but probably not, and 5) play time.
  2. Plan to pull one all-nighter for every three crafts you choose.
  3. Pencil in an extra 2-3 trips to the craft store, and add on 30 minutes to each trip as a cushion for the fact that everyone in front of you will be returning merchandise and it will be the checker’s first week (plus Michael’s doesn’t actually have clerks, that I’ve seen).
  4. Make sure to book a spa day for right after the party. You will need it.

Are you a kid party fanatic? Does your child get a party every year, or do you skip a year or two?

My follow-up post will be on how to keep kid birthday parties simple, so share your thoughts. I’d love to include them.

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Photo credits: Rainbow cake from SunValleyMag.com; Decoration banners from Pear Tree Greetings. For the record, I would love to attend parties hosted by the incredibly tired parents who have made these crafts.