Tag Archives: boat safety

Ain’t No Such Thing as a Free Boat Ride

I recently received the “dispatch from the field” below via email.

I love getting stories like this, because they usually arrive just when I need a pick-me-up. Like right after receiving a note from the bank saying, “We’re sorry. At this time we can’t take the PMI off your loan because we reviewed your last five years of Netflix records and there were not enough action movies in your viewing history.” Or some other stupid excuse that proves they will never, ever do what I’m asking. (I wrote more about my bank paperwork depression here.)

So…. If you need a pick-me-up, or a show of solidarity in parenting chaos, read this from my friend M:

Hello, Evelyn, my dear,

As a fellow momma of small boys, I thought you would find this funny. We went on vacation to San Diego last week. Our hotel stay included a boat ride on a Mississippi sternwheeler. Makes sense. San Diego = Mark Twain. Or something.

Cam loves all forms of transportation, so we were excited about this. Only we boarded the boat and noticed large, toddler-sized gaps in the railings on the lower deck. We pictured him pitching himself off into the bay.

It was scary.

Toddler Eating Sternwheeler. MomsicleBlog

We tried to find an isolated part of the boat where we could cordon him off for safety, but this got tough because once we were on the boat, Cam became extremely excited and wouldn’t stop running around while screaming “ME ON A BOAT!!!!”

Photo is attached. I believe I captured total psychosis setting in.

Toddler Psychosis Setting In. MomsicleBlog

Longest 90 minutes of our lives. Beware the phrase FREE BOAT RIDE. Ain’t no such thing.




Please send me your own dispatches (momsicleblog [at] gmail.com). I love them.

Oh yeah, and have you liked Momsicle on Facebook? I make a face like the picture above every time there’s a new like.