Some Hilarious Things Four Year Olds Say

Our little ragtag crew went for a leisurely, and very short stroll that involved eating snacks hike this morning. The Chaos Team was joined by our pal Luke. (I’m calling him Luke because of his fondness for Star Wars.)

Luke is four, like K-Pants, and four year olds are a strange breed. They’re like part crotchety-old-man-with-no-dialogue-filter and part endless-optimist. And it is gayyre-awhhhn-teeed that everything that comes out of their mouths is 100% accurate.

• Me: You said, Thunderstorms like dirty air? I’m not sure if that’s right.
• K-Pants: Yes it is. The trees told me that.

So when two of these quirky beasts get together, the best plan is to just sit back and enjoy. Here, join us on our hike at the Portland Audubon Society.

A Chat Between Four Year Olds (All Facts Below Are Certifiably True, Especially Brain Sizes)

K-PANTS: This owl is Julio. He’s a genius because geniuses have black eyes.

K-PANTS: This bird wants to invite Julio over to his house for a play date.

LUKE: Han Solo is Chewbacca’s friend.

K-PANTS: I think Julio said he wants a mama.

LUKE: I don’t see any mamas around here.

K-PANTS: They’re over on that tree.

LUKE: Did you know my shoes have good grip?

K-PANTS: Yeah.

LUKE: I’ve been here before. I have a huge huge brain.

K-PANTS: Yeah, me too. I have a huuuuge brain.

LUKE: All this green is not moving.

K-PANTS: This vest is bigger than me.

LUKE: My brain sticks out but you can’t see it because it’s camouflaged.

K-PANTS: Mmmmhmmm.

LUKE: I have an enormous brain. Bigger than that plant.

K-PANTS: Can I have a play date at your house for a long time? Like five minutes?

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